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*Internal Screaming*

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My partner is going to try and tell his parents about me. His Opus Dei, conservative, elderly parents who already have one transgender son who they misgender constantly. Yep. Them.

Does he open with the “my partner is a man” thing, or the “my partner is trans” thing? Who knows! Maybe he’ll write it all out in Alphabetti Spaghetti just to highlight how fucking absurd the whole situation is.

It might be quite difficult for someone who didn’t grow up Roman Catholic to wrap their heads around how utterly opposed they are to the idea of anything LGBT.

this is what we have to contend with

Sunshine: …Currently reading a book on theism my dad recommended to me. Very wordy.

Me: No pictures? (shocked face)

Sunshine: None, but he has equated same sex marriage with mecroohilia [sic], bestiality and killing disabled children, which is nice of him.

His arguments come from a natural law point of view, and I find them amazingly intellectually flawed…

Apparently homosexuality is a genetic predisposition “for which the sufferer is not at fault, and can only call forth our sympathy” 

It’s not that they’re bigoted, or hateful, or anything like that. They’re just from another world. A world where saying crap like that is completely normal, and being transgender just doesn’t compute.

His mother cries and asks herself what she did wrong to “make” her son trans. She doesn’t understand that it is not a punishment or a curse.

On our first date, my sunshine started laughing weakly. He’d realised how difficult it was going to be telling his parents. I had some inkling, but didn’t fully understand back then just what he was up against.

When I’ve tried asking non-Catholic people for advice, they just go, “It’ll be fine!” You have no idea. None at all. It won’t. But thanks for the positivity.

Catholic people are sympathetic, but as for advice, there just isn’t any.

My hope is that this is the nudge they need to support their son wholeheartedly. That they will see this as a sign from God of His acceptance or trans people, and that they should do the same. That’d be nice. I’ve never been sent by God before.

My fear is that they will blame my sunshine falling in love with a trans masculine person on their other son. That they will refuse to believe the truth of it- that we make each other happy, and that it goes beyond sex or gender.

My expectation lies somewhere between the two. Whatever happens, I love him. And I know he loves them. And I will do everything in my power to make sure this works out. This is about family, and about truth. There is nothing wrong with me. I was divinely created to be the person I am, no more or less than anyone else. Together, we will all make this work. Because we love each other.

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About Big Rook

Chess coaching and events in the north-west of England

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